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Climbing Mountains

Sunday, February 7th, 2010

When setting goals for your life, have you ever considered when you reach the goals to be like reaching the pinnacle on a mountain top? Do you want to get to the top as fast as you can so you can see the view from the highest point? Or do you enjoy the hike up, taking in the scenery along the way? Do you consider accomplishing them all as reaching only the highest peak such as Mt. McKinley? Or do you visualize a whole chain of mountains such as the Appalachians or the Rockies as being the high points of your whole lifetime?

View from Camden, ME mountain

Sometimes I find myself so focused on the end result, reaching the pinnacle, that I forget to check out the scenery along the way. Then, suddenly, I find myself in a situation that’s very precarious and difficult to maneuver around. That’s when having a climbing partner is helpful. These partners could be your friends, your family, your coworkers, or some other special person that has come into your life to help you out right when you need a hand. Sometimes it’s only words of encouragement as you cross a particularly narrow ledge or it could be someone who is secure enough to come by and tie on a safety line to help you through. Maybe it’s someone that has been there before and they have a map of the area to help you get out because you got lost and fear may have paralyzed you where you are. Or maybe they simply have crossed paths with you and you decide you like each other’s company enough to help each other find a way out together. Whatever the situation is we sometimes have to pass through the difficult sections of our mountains in order to find the hidden waterfalls or fields of wildflowers that you would not have enjoyed if you had a well paved road right up to the top.

I’ve not been writing much lately as I have been overwhelmed myself with getting into a situations that I have found difficult to navigate by myself. It seems that there are several people that I have crossed paths with that are in similar situations going around and up their mountains. As I try different routes to get around the obstacles before me I find out quickly that the chosen path will not work for me. I’ve been fortunate enough to have people around me offering their words of encouragement or assistance in little ways to keep me from getting completely stuck.

I have to remind myself every now and then that, although it may not look like much progress is being made up my chain of mountains, I am gaining very valuable experience that will make things easier for me if I should ever face these particular challenges again or I will be able to help out someone else in the future by sharing my experiences.

When I consider the range of mountains I have challenged myself to climb in this lifetime I find that I have taken many detours and certainly have taken some trails that others never consider. Taking the unusual routes may have set me up to miss what everyone else got to experience or it may have only delayed my journey for reaching the top of some of the mountains. I do know that I have some interesting stories though and everyone else that went the usual route seems to enjoy the stories of my adventures because I was daring enough to try it and then tell them what they missed.

Posted in Adventure, Personal Development, Uncategorized | No Responses »

Quack Like a Duck or Soar Like an Eagle

Tuesday, November 17th, 2009

I love reading inspirational stories and parables on self-improvement. It’s one of the tricks I use to keep myself in an almost constant state of being in a positive mindset and to help get me out of any funky mood I might find myself in when faced with stressful situations. On my Twitter account I have created a list of people that I follow who are often tweeting inspirational messages. On my iGoogle homepage I have an application that gives me rotating inspirational quotes and in my RSS reader I follow several blogs devoted to self-improvement. I also have great friends that forward on emails with wonderful stories. Tonight I received a new one that I’ve not read before and I’d like to share it with you.

Ducks Quack — Eagles Soar

No one can make you serve customers well. That’s because great service is a choice.

Harvey Mackay, tells a wonderful story about a cab driver that proved this point.

He was waiting in line for a ride at the airport. When a cab pulled up, the first thing Harvey noticed was that the taxi was polished to a bright shine. Smartly dressed in a white shirt, black tie, and freshly pressed black slacks, the cab driver jumped out and rounded the car to open the back passenger door for Harvey.

He handed my friend a laminated card and said, ‘I’m Wally, your driver. While I’m loading your bags in the trunk I’d like you to read my mission statement.’

Taken aback, Harvey read the card.

It said:

Wally’s Mission Statement:
To get my customers to their destination in the quickest, safest and cheapest way possible in a friendly environment.

This blew Harvey away. Especially when he noticed that the inside of the cab matched the outside. Spotlessly clean!

As he slid behind the wheel, Wally said, ‘Would you like a cup of coffee? I have a thermos of regular and one of decaf.’

My friend said jokingly, ‘No, I’d prefer a soft drink.’

Wally smiled and said, ‘No problem. I have a cooler up front with regular and Diet Coke, water and orange juice.’

Almost stuttering, Harvey said, ‘I’ll take a Diet Coke.’

Handing him his drink, Wally said, ‘If you’d like something to read, I have The Wall Street Journal, Time, Sports Illustrated and USA Today.’

As they were pulling away, Wally handed my friend another laminated card, ‘These are the stations I get and the music they play, if you’d like to listen to the radio.’

And as if that weren’t enough, Wally told Harvey that he had the air conditioning on and asked if the temperature was comfortable for him.

Then he advised Harvey of the best route to his destination for that time of day. He also let him know that he’d be happy to chat and tell him about some of the sights or, if Harvey preferred, to leave him with his own thoughts.

‘Tell me, Wally,’ my amazed friend asked the driver, ‘have you always served customers like this?’

Wally smiled into the rear view mirror. ’No, not always. In fact, it’s only been in the last two years. My first five years driving, I spent most of my time complaining like all the rest of the cabbies do. Then I heard on the radio one day that if you get up in the morning expecting to have a bad day, you’ll rarely disappoint yourself. He said, ‘Stop complaining! Differentiate yourself from your competition. Don’t be a duck. Be an eagle. Ducks quack and complain. Eagles soar above the crowd.”

That hit me right between the eyes,’ said Wally. ’That was really talking about me. I was always quacking and complaining, so I decided to change my attitude and become an eagle. I looked around at the other cabs and their drivers. The cabs were dirty, the drivers were unfriendly, and the customers were unhappy. So I decided to make some changes. I put in a few at a time. When my customers responded well, I did more.’

‘I take it that has paid off for you,’ Harvey said.

‘It sure has,’ Wally replied. ’My first year as an eagle, I doubled my income from the previous year. This year I’ll probably quadruple it. You were lucky to get me today. I don’t sit at cabstands anymore. My customers call me for appointments on my cell phone or leave a message on my answering machine. If I can’t pick them up myself, I get a reliable cabbie friend to do it and I take a piece of the action.’

Wally was phenomenal. He was running a limo service out of a Yellow Cab. I’ve probably told that story to more than fifty cab drivers over the years, and only two took the idea and ran with it. Whenever I go to their cities, I give them a call. The rest of the drivers quacked like ducks and told me all the reasons they couldn’t do any of what I was suggesting.

Wally the Cab Driver made a different choice. He decided to stop quacking like ducks and start soaring like eagles.

How about us?

Smile, and the whole world smiles with you… The ball is in our hands!

Ducks Quack, Eagles Soar

Have a nice day, unless you have already made other plans.

I’m not much of a morning person. I’m not normally grumpy so much as groggy until I am fully awake. This morning shortly after I woke up I tweeted, “Still trying to figure out if it feels like a GOOD morning or not. Too tired to tell. So I’ll just decide it is & go make my latte.” I’m glad I decided to have a good day. There was not anything bad about it. I think tomorrow I’ll decide to have a great day. :)

“Most folks are about as happy as
they make up their minds to be.”
- Abraham Lincoln

Posted in Personal Development, Uncategorized | 2 Responses »

Facing Your Fears

Sunday, November 15th, 2009

The other day I wrote a post called Help Wanted that revealed one of my biggest fears and exposed my own personal financial situation. I’ve questioned myself about whether or not that was a smart move. What was my motivation for doing that and revealing what many could consider to be such a private part of my life? Please allow me to explain.

My Past – the Private Parts

I mentioned that I came from a family that did not have a lot of money. I had all of the basics that I ever needed growing up – food, shelter, and medical care – and a few luxuries here and there when times were good. Still, I learned at a very young age to not ask for too much or else face the disappointment that came from being told no because we didn’t have the money. I could see the stress it would cause my mother who was divorced from my dad when I was only five and, although she married again, she essentially was the breadwinner of the family and I consider her to have been a single parent raising me and one of my younger brothers from her second marriage. Finances were always a struggle for her until after I was an adult on my own, making my own way. Even so, her abundant times never lasted for very long after I was an adult. I was more fortunate as a kid when spending summers at my dad’s with him, my step-mom and other two brothers. There seemed to be a little more abundance, at least more choices in the refrigerator and pantry, because of the stable two-income family they created.

As I grew up no one ever talked about money unless it was the lack of not having it. I didn’t learn how to make it except by getting a good job and working hard. If you were lucky to work for a good company you might get some benefits like health insurance, a retirement plan, and maybe a holiday bonus. My dad always had his own construction business and he labored hard as he was well-respected and in demand for the quality work that he does. However, being your own boss of a small business, you are paying for your own benefits, if you can afford it. So I believe they may have relied on my step-mom’s job to provide for health and retirement benefits. I really do not know as that sort of thing was never discussed.

Now that I am an adult and finally exploring all of the ways possible to get myself ahead of the rat race that works a typical M-F 9-5 job because I have learned that I have entrepreneurial skills and a desire to break out of the ordinary, I have learned that families who have more financial abundance do not seem to mind talking about money with other family members. The children of those families often grow up learning the ways their parents taught about investing, saving, and getting ahead of all the other families that barely get by. The skill these successful families has is communication. They are not afraid or embarrassed to talk about making money because it is a skill that they have learned and it seems natural. Just like when a momma cat teaches her kittens to hunt so they can survive. Their communication usually does not have any negativity associated with the subject. This eases the pressure that other families that are less fortunate may feel. Without that negative association they are more open to discuss ideas about different ways to make money and less likely to face ridicule or negativity for suggesting something new because their mindset is different than those who do not have it.

I’m not sure if because of my location of growing up in the South I also learned that it was not polite to talk to other families or people about how much money one makes or if it was only because we didn’t have much money ourselves and it was something lower income families typically say. I never asked or snooped to find out what men that I’ve dated were making. I know that some have been very successful because they openly talk about it and I am fortunate to usually attract that now whenever I do find someone I am interested in and I do not assume that because they are well off that I will be taken care of or that I’ve found a sugar daddy. I have had to rely on my own finances for so long and have never been offered to be taken care of unless it came with the price of compromising my personal beliefs, values, and self-respect.

This all of course has set me up to be in the situation that I now find myself which is having worked hard to get ahead, struggling to acquire as much as possible with only my own personal income, and because I dream of doing so much more than being average, I have made big investments in myself to unlearn all of the things that I was raised to believe which only would have kept me the level that my parents reached – I want more than that. I’ve taken a big financial risk to try a new business on my own that I discovered was not my passion and came out of it at an overall current financial loss but not a failure because it eliminated something I would not have been satisfied with. Now that I have discovered my passions – one of them I’ve discovered is writing here on this blog – and I am educating myself in another area I always had great interest but never pursued, I’ve reached way beyond the limit that my single income can keep up with. This was my big fear – facing financial failure and risking my credit or worse, the possibility of losing the things I have worked so hard for up to this point.

Looking back to my past though, I already did lose everything once before. There just wasn’t as much at stake back then because the only asset I had acquired at that point was a vehicle that was totaled when I did not have full coverage insurance. I was still so close to the beginning of my adult life that it doesn’t make a big difference to me now when I think back and remember. Soon after losing my vehicle I ended up living in a tent for three months when I decided to go back to college and until I could get into an apartment with two other roommates. I was given a little boost when I decided to go back by step-dad #2 because he was an auto mechanic and had a cheap used car at his shop they gave me to get back on my feet. It was later traded for another used car from his shop that was slightly more reliable and in a few years I traded it in for my first newer car purchase.

The Present – the Motivation

Now back to the question to myself, why share all of this with the public? What do I have to gain by this? Sympathy? That’s not what I’m after. Charity? No, I’m too stubborn to accept it unless I have no other choice and it comes from family where I believe it is typical to expect help. I want to earn my way instead. Support? A-ha! Now we are getting close.

It is my belief that by sharing the personal stories of my life that I might be able to help someone else gain different perspectives to consider or to inspire someone that has faced similar struggles they have not yet overcome. As I go through the journey of my life I want to validate my credibility to everyone whether you doubted my capabilities or cheered and supported me all along. By documenting my progress here on this blog, I am able to prove beyond a doubt that I am a real person, my stories are true from my perspective, and that when someone like me, given my current and past situations, makes it to the level of success that I desire to achieve – financial freedom – then, to myself more than anyone, I can validate my credibility to teach others the secrets that so many others have a hard time finding.

I have learned that the people closest to you may not support you in the way you think they should and it doesn’t mean that they do not support you. You have to communicate what you expect if it is something different than what they are giving. I do not have the benefit of having a significant other in my life that I can lean my head on their shoulder and expect a hug when I’ve had a stressful day or to look forward to telling them my achievements when something great happens.

I have a lot of wonderful friends that I can share many things with, however, most of the closest ones are married, have their own lives, and are raising children that I cannot wait until I one day will be able to have. In my eyes they are a success. Maybe not all of them are financially successful by my personal goals yet, but in relationships most certainly.

Facing My Fears

I have found that whenever something is bothering me I have to confront my dis-ease and release it or else I will internalize it and it will manifest into a disease or other physical ailment. The easiest and best way for me in most scenarios it to write about it. I still do not like verbal confrontation with anyone that I may have an issue with, although I find it much easier now than I did 10+ years ago and it seems to be much less frequent than even just a few years ago. Writing for me is an outlet that allows me to create my thoughts in a thorough manner without interruption from anyone else or giving them an opportunity to twist the words against me in an argument or debate (which I severely dislike).

I do not seem to mind being an open book and sharing information about my life. I think I have led a rather interesting one so far and lately, on more than one occasion, I’ve been told I should write a book. It’s on my Bucket List of things to do now. I’m not 100% sure what I want to write about specifically yet. If anyone has any best-seller suggestions please let me know. ;) I’m am sure that whatever I do end up writing about it will include many of the little adventures of my life.

It’s funny to me to think that as a teenager I was much more private about my life and rarely would have a phone conversation without going into my room for privacy, even if it was just one of my girlfriends for a quick call. Now, within reason, I and nearly everyone I see seems to have all kinds of random conversations in plain view for all of our friends to see and we have them on social media networks like Facebook and Twitter. It’s more than entertainment, it’s people looking for praise when they’ve done something they are proud of, support when they are feeling down or challenged, feeling wanted when they are lonely, asking for advice on something, promoting and soliciting business, and connecting with others to get new ideas for projects they are working on.

The Results

My outcome is not finished yet when dealing with this current situation I am in, however I am dealing with it. I’m finally facing the challenge of the fear I have before me. I am working on a solution – even if it isn’t an easy one or one that meets all my wishes. My close friends and family now know what I am going through and are morally supportive. Rather than asking me to participate in something I cannot do right now, they are offering ideas or advice to see if any of it will help me out. Since I live alone, hundreds of miles away from any family members or most of my closest friends, I need that sort of moral support and to feel connected to someone. It lets me know that they care even if they cannot make what I am going through go away. I think it is important for us all to feel supported, connected, and that we are loved – that we make a difference being here in this life to someone.

When dealing with fears there are several things I have learned:

The fastest way to make any fear vanish is to experience it fully.
To overcome your fear, you deal with what emerges and put attention on it.
Nothing has any power over you, except the power you give it.
Fear can cause people to hesitate and/or stop in their tracks.
More is learned in pain (facing your fears) than in pleasure.
Better late than never.
If there is no risk, there are no goodies (i.e. euphoria of overcoming the fear and any other benefits it may bring).
Anger is a fear that the offense will occur again.
In order for things to change, you must change (you have to do something different to get past that first step of facing your fear).

Much of this wisdom I have learned has been through the many self-development courses I have taken. One that I highly recommend from one of my mentors, Marshall Sylver, is his two-day event called Turning Point. It is a great beginning for anyone to learn how to overcome their fears, understanding the types of communication for better relationships, learning the art of persuasion and influence (a great skill for anyone, not just for salespeople), and the skills of subconscious reprogramming so you can achieve anything you set your mind to. I believe that I even have a few discounted or free tickets available for someone that is serious about attending (a $2000 value). Contact me for more details.

If going to seminars is not your style and you can only commit yourself to reading books, there are several books for inspiration – many of which I recommend are in the carousel at the bottom of this webpage. The number one foundational book that nearly all speakers I have ever heard reference to is Think and Grow Rich by Napoleon Hill.

Thank you for being here with me as I go through this personally challenging time. I hope that you will come back again to see how I progress. To stay automatically updated on new posts that I publish, be sure to sign up for the RSS feed (click the little orange icon in the right sidebar above the heading Recent Posts). Please explore some other pages on the site and help support me further by clicking on any of the links that may interest you and also by sharing this site with others. If you have a suggestion for me, a subject you would like me to write about or information to share, please click on the suggestion tab near the top left side of the screen. Remember to leave comments too on any page or post where comments are enabled. Let me know you are out there, reading this, and if any of it is useful to you. And finally, if you are on Facebook, please join my group Studio di Mare to connect with me and others that share passions, information, creativity, and adventures.

Posted in Personal Development, Uncategorized | 3 Responses »

Bucket List

Sunday, November 1st, 2009

Since watching the movie “The Bucket List” with Jack Nicholson and Morgan Freeman and filling out some random Facebook Bucket List Questionnaire that someone else made up for you to check off items, I have looked at my own life and the many adventures I’ve been on and the items that I’ve accomplished so far in this life. I recall back to the days in middle school when my classmates and I would create “Slam Books”, a notebook somewhat similar to a Bucket List that asked for answers to a bunch of random questions, and pass them around to fill out until we were caught by our teachers. Rather than check off the tasks I have completed from someone else’s Bucket List, I’ve decided to create my own. Really, who wants to laugh until milk or some other beverage has come out of their nose? I have many other more interesting accomplishments that I’d rather boast about and challenge myself to, and they are less painful or embarrassing.

For this list I’m going to start of with several that I know I have accomplished and others that I plan to or simply dream to, maybe, one day accomplish. Some are more important dreams to me than others and some are just quick thoughts. I’ll add to this list anytime I think of something new I want to do. Life gives me the freedom of choice to change my mind or add on at any time.

Should I consider myself a failure if I do not complete them all? No. This is a dream sheet. Something to give me hope, to look forward to, and a way of keeping score of accomplishments that I can look back on to see how far I’ve come. As you read my list I encourage you to create a Bucket List of your own. Get creative. Allow yourself to be artistic, silly, adventurous, romantic, charitable, practical, and daring. Challenge yourself. Step outside of your comfort zone, if you dare. Make it public or keep it private to only yourself, it doesn’t matter. There’s a site that I found, Dream Cockpit, where you can create very specific dream goals in a online community format that you can share or keep private. Just allow yourself to dream. You might surprize yourself at how just that first step, putting intention into your thoughts, can create the opportunities you may have previously denied yourself or told yourself that it is something you can never do (even when you secretly want to).

Meet, fall in love, and marry the man that will be my best friend.
Give birth to at least one child.
Speak fluent Italian.
Learn to play the piano.
Restore my grandmother’s piano from the early 1900s.
Learn kite-surfing.
Fly in a helicopter.

I missed the helicopter over to Necker but my pilot let me fly the plane.

~~Fly a plane.~~
Get my pilot’s license.
Go on a road trip across the USA.
Drive all along the Pacific Coast Highway, stopping to visit different parts of the wine country.
Ride on a tandem bike.
~~Go surfing.~~
~~Go water skiing.~~
~~Go snow skiing.~~
~~Travel by train.~~
Go sailing in the Mediterranean.
~~Live on a yacht.~~
Own a home on the beach or the Intercoastal.
Own a home in St. Barth’s.
Own a home in Italy.
Write a book.
~~Go ziplining.~~
~~Go white-water rafting.~~
Fly in a wingsuit (BASE Jumping) - Man Can Fly!
Go bungee jumping.
Go to the Eiffel Tower.
Go to the Louvre.
Spend New Year’s Eve in Rome.
Spend New Year’s Eve in New York City.
Visit the Vatican.
See the Coliseum.
~~Horseback riding on the beach~~.
~~Get airborne in a vehicle (on purpose) and land safely.~~

You'd be surprised how many times I did this for the shot.

Learn stunt car driving.
Go cave diving.
Go sky-diving.
Go ice skating in Central Park.
Take a romantic carriage ride through the park.
See a Broadway play.
See Billy Joel in concert.
Meet Sir Richard Branson.
Ride in a hot-air balloon.
Fly into space on a Virgin Galactic flight.
~~Vacation on Necker Island.~~
~~Go to Italy.~~
~~See Michaelangelo’s David.~~
~~Go to the Caribbean by yacht.~~
Visit the Las Vegas strip.
See a live Cirque du Soleil show.
Pet a Siberian tiger.
Swim with dolphins.
~~Stand under a waterfall.~~

standing in the waterfall, what a great massage!

Become a millionaire.
Visit a castle.
Create a successful online artist network.
Be a successful real estate investor.
Quit my day job & work only for myself.
Own the home that was built by my great-grandfather and restore it.
Raise a large sum of money ($100,000) for a charity.
Create a foundation for a worthwhile cause.
~~Drive a Jeep through the desert.~~
~~Eat fire.~~
~~Walk on a bed of broken glass with bare feet.~~
Walk on a bed of coals with bare feet.
Camp at the beach on St. John’s.
~~Spend the night on the beach watching the stars fall.~~
~~Hike up a mountain.~~
Hike the Appalachian Trail.
~~Watch the sunrise from a mountain top.~~

Sunrise from Cadillac Mountain, Acadia National Park, Maine

Recent add-ons that I thought were great from my friend’s list:
View the Northern Lights – Aurora Borealis
Cruise through Alaska
Sail around the world
Go on an African photo safari
Visit all 50 States

After recent adventures revisiting old interests:
Become a sought after, highly compensated model
Have my modeling images published in a nationally recognized magazine or catalog

Posted in Adventure, Creativity, Personal Development, Uncategorized | 13 Responses »

Sonia’s Mission to Help Teenagers Rise Above

Thursday, August 20th, 2009

Sonia is a friend that I met a few months ago at the Next Level seminar I took in Las Vegas (see previous posts Life and Death and The Road Less Traveled) has had quite a turning point in her life. When I met her, she was a single mom in California and a high school Math teacher without any real clear direction that I could see, except she wanted to do something to make her life more fulfilling for her and her young son. Since that event she has taken a couple of more courses and the change that I am seeing in her life (in less than 3 months since we met) is that she is now living a life with definite purpose and incredible energy to create the life she wants. I would like to share with you a letter I recently received from her sent to our group of attendees from the Next Level.

Hey Guys!

I miss you all so much. I can’t tell you the great impact your love and friendship has made on my life. I am creating amazing results! Our experience together was definitely a turning point and catalyst for the wonderful things I am creating!

As you know or may remember, I am a High School Math teacher and my dream and passion is teenagers and their personal growth. During the Turning Point and Aj’s Hypnosis seminar I got really clear on my dream of creating a teen seminar company. And what do you know…Here I am! I am having my first seminar this Saturday, August 22nd. The theme is “I am responsible for what I create.” It’s about teens getting that there is power in responsibility. Included will be: listening, goal setting, law of attraction concepts, and much more! All very powerful tools that we have been blessed to have learned and are life-changing; especially for teens and their fertile minds. I am very excited!

The reason I am writing is to request support, most of my Latino teens come from low income families and do not yet have the resources or mindset to create the fees of $39 per student. I am offering subsidies of $20 to some students and full scholarships to a few. I am raising this money for them. I would greatly appreciate your monetary support in any amount. If you are willing and able to support these teens in their growth by being their angels, please email me the amount you would like to donate. I will then send you a money request via Pay Pal and I will email you video testimonials next week once they are done with their wonderful experience. If Pay Pal doesn’t work for you, you can always call me and make other arrangements.

Thanks so much in advance for you support, love, and friendship,

you guys are awesome and I love you very much,

Sonia Garcia

RISE ABOVE Teen Seminars

Her mission is one that I fully support and I believe there are many of you out there that would like to know more or are willing to help out. Myself and a few others are already sponsoring scholarships. If you would like to contribute to her scholarship fund for her mission, then you can contact me or Sonia at “RiseAboveTeens at AOL.com”.

Are you looking for more purpose in your own life? If so, then click here for more information from the mentor that has helped Sonia and myself find our purpose. And please, feel free to leave comments or tell me about your accomplishments if you have chosen to live a life of purpose. I love sharing positive news!

Update: After the first seminar, Sonia sent me this video with thank yous to the sponsors and testimonials from the teens at the program.

Posted in Business, Personal Development | 2 Responses »

Sister Act Radio

Sunday, July 19th, 2009

In my last post I shared some of my adventure from my vacation earlier this year. I also mentioned that I wanted to introduce to you some of the amazing new friends that I met at the Next Level event that I attended. But first, let me just say that I have attended several events for personal and business development over the past couple of years and I have met a lot of amazing people. Several times I have heard it said that you are the average of the 5 people that you hang out with the most. If you want to be a successful business person, a talented artist, be in a loving relationship, etc. then you should associate yourself with people that have these qualities of that which you seek. If you are not living the life you want right now or are not on the path to creating it, take a look around at the people you associate with the most. Have they reached or are going in the direction you want your life to go? If not, you need to change your friends or you need to change your friends.

When I attend these kinds of events I can expect to find lots of wonderful people there because they are there just like I am – to learn and to improve their lives. So when you are in an environment like that it is not difficult to make new, positive friends with a like-mindset going in the direction you also want to go. You end up creating new alliances and support teams where you really want and do help each other. You do this because you know that the more you give, the more you receive and you do it willingly, not just so you can receive but because it feels so good to give your help or share information you know that can help someone else. I think it all has to do with some of the principles of the Law of Attraction – Ask and you shall receive and That which you focus on expands.

Now on to some introductions, at this last event there were 42 people attending. If I remember correctly, there were at least 3 groups of sisters or sisters + mother, several couples, one new couple who met at a previous event, only a few who were attending without their spouses were left at home because of work and taking care of family, and a few others like me were simply single. This event really focuses on team building, challenging your personal character strengths, and facing and overcoming your fears. For me, one of the things I was most interested in was the team building skills. I’m not exactly sure why, but I felt before going into the event that my skills in that area were not very strong. I ended up learning otherwise.

I am not sure what planted the seed in my head that I thought I was not very good at being a leader. Certainly, I felt that I was a good team player as I have always been able to get along well and work with others no matter how difficult they may be. I suppose that because I do not consider myself to be very outspoken in a take charge kind of way that I was not “leader” material. When faced with our Life and Death challenge at the event, we were put to another test of time which was quickly running out while everyone was “testing” scenarios to accomplish our challenge. I was not getting the attention I wanted for my idea due to my lack of “outspoken” speaking skills in a room when there were 42 people all trying to come up with the best decision. Instead of getting everyone to listen to me, I managed to get a small group that did and would support me. I just decided to go and took the leap of faith that it would work. And it did! Then the others stopped testing and quickly followed since I was there to support them from the other side.

Two of the women, sisters, from my new group of friends that I want to pay particular attention to now are Rachel and April Capil. You can find links to their websites on the right. One is a very talented lifestyle family photographer and the other is a recent Cancer survior providing inspiration and tips to other Cancer patients and a supporter of the Green Thinking movement. They have also recently launched their own talk radio show on the internet called Sister Act. Being the big supporter I am and fan of my friends following their passions I was able to tune into the first show at work one day while it was live. This was only a 30 minute segment and was mostly introductions with some calls in from our friends.

The next two shows I was unable to catch live and decided I wanted to hear how it was going the other night. So I decided to play the recordings while I did some research on my computer the other evening. Show #2 had some technical difficulties and cut off about halfway through the show just as I was getting some really good information. Bummer. So I turned on Show #3. They repeated what they were teaching on the 2nd show and continued on. Yay! What was exciting for me is that the research I had planned on doing that night while listening turned out to be the very thing they were talking about. Instead of doing more research I got some other tasks I needed done while I listened.
~ That which you focus on expands.

What were they talking about you might be asking? Click on the link below and find out. :) This episode will be particularly useful information for anyone who is interested in generating more traffic to their websites and to effectively market anything that they are selling. They have learned from one of the experts, Maria Andros, in the field of Social Media trafficking and they are discussing some of the techniques they learned that will catapult your website to the top of the search engines without paying for expensive advertising campaigns.

They are sharing this information because they love it and it is working for them. Test it out. Go over to a Google search page and type in Sister Act Radio and check out who is at the top of the page of results. When I did it they were the first two listings. These ladies are already leading the way and are going the same direction that I am. I’ll certainly follow their lessons. We are all here to give and receive support from each other.

After you listen to them, check them out on Twitter and/or join their Facebook page to find out more about their next shows that are airing every other Monday morning. Rachel and April, I look forward to your next shows.

Listen to Sister Act Radio on Blog Talk Radio

Posted in Business, Personal Development, Social Media | No Responses »

The Road Less Traveled

Thursday, July 16th, 2009

A couple of months ago I went on vacation. I split up my trip into different segments - adventure, connecting with family, and learning. Last year, I had purchased a series of personal and business development seminars with Marshall Sylver and this year after Memorial Day was the final one of my series that I had not yet attended – an advanced course called The Next Level which is held in Las Vegas. So I planned my vacation around this trip and it was amazing.

I started off by flying across country into San Diego, CA and renting a Jeep from Fox Rent A Car. I’m a Jeep girl, love adventure, and couldn’t see myself driving around in anything else, especially for what I had planned on this trip. I then drove about an hour East into the mountains to stay with my great-aunt whom I barely remembered ever meeting before at my grandfather’s funeral back in 1996. Oh how I wish I had gotten to know her sooner! It seems my sense of adventure runs in the family and I really felt a special connection with this lady. She and I are definitely kindred spirits. I smiled everytime she would say something that sounded like something I would have said.

After a couple of days with her I popped back into San Diego to meet another dear friend for lunch that I instantly connected to during another one of Marshall Sylver’s elite, invitation only events back in September that happened to be held at Sir Richard Branson’s private island in the BVI called Necker Island. This one was the Billionaire Mastermind Summit. I actually made several close friends there, two of which live nearby me now and I talk to them almost daily. I also met and masterminded with Bill Walsh and Raymond Aaron. In fact, I baked Raymond’s birthday cake while he was there.

Before leaving from Florida to go on my trip and knowing that I wanted to drive through the desert I decided I’d better map out my route in order to know where I was going and to not be stuck with the pre-determined route my GPS would want to take me. So I got on Google Maps and figured out what I would be seeing, how long of a drive it would be, and it’s exact route. I settled on Joshua Tree National Park and the Mojave Desert National Preserve to satisfy my desert craving. I had to be at the Las Vegas resort, checked in, have returned the rental, and ready by 6pm when the Next Level started on that Tuesday. My drive was estimated to be around 8.5 hours going the scenic route. I learned right then that you can drag the highlighted road path on Google Maps onto whatever roads you want whenever it defaulted for me to travel around the parks. I wanted to see nature, have a little adventure, and maybe get on some dirt roads with the Jeep – not highways and interstates. I had no idea how perfect this route I picked out would be for me until I actually got there.

Back to being on my trip and after a great sushi lunch and visit with my friend I made the decision to head East again to get near my starting point for the beginning of my next day’s big adventure – driving through the desert to Las Vegas. I wound up in Palm Desert for the night, got an early start the next morning (I still was waking up on my East Coast internal clock), and began my drive through Joshua Tree National Park. This trip was my first to California and through any desert that I can remember. I loved it and although I was by myself, I did not feel alone. I stopped anytime I found something interesting to take pictures of and I made sure to also upload periodic “Tweets” to my Twitter and Facebook accounts from my iPhone so that everyone could be there with me.

After Joshua Tree Park and many stops for photographs and mini-explorations off my path I found myself on Historic Route 66. I even filled up at an old filling station that back during the day was a traditional road-side diner. Next was the Mojave Preserve and this is where my fun got even better. My little 2-lane road turned into a dirt road after about 30 minutes into the drive. There was no traffic to speak of and the only other bodies around were some ranchers that I passed along with the cattle when I saw a small little brown sign with the picture of a Jeep. Yippee! I definitely picked the right path.

It didn’t take long before my dirt road went from being 2-lanes down to 1 and then again down to trails!!! I was in heaven and having so much fun. I wished then that some of my fellow Jeep club members was riding along with me. I continued my trail ride for another couple of hours, all the while stopping to take pictures and enjoy the scenery. I finally arrived to the resort sometime around 4pm, checked in, returned my rental, and took the shuttle back so that I arrived just in time – okay, only 10 minutes late. Not too bad after a day full of adventure if you ask me.

“Do not go where the path may lead, go instead where there is no path, and leave a trail.” – Ralph Waldo Emerson

My great-aunt Eleanor & I enjoying some ice cream

My friend Bren & I at our sushi lunch

Ocotillo Plant in Joshua Tree National Park

Taking a mini-hike in Joshua Tree

Joshua Tree

Getting my kicks...

Happy Trails to You

I normally drive a Wrangler and this Compass was fun

In the next blog I’ll share with you some more about the people that I met at The Next Level. These 41 new friends all seem to be doing something special. The lessons we learned and the experiences we shared will never be forgotten. I can’t wait to introduce you to my friends. They are the best! :)

You can read about one of our experiences from The Next Level that I already blogged on - Life and Death.

Posted in Adventure, Personal Development | 1 Response »

Soul Searching

Saturday, July 4th, 2009

In this final discussion about, “What is painful in your life?” I would like to share about Spiritual Pain. No one gave a response about this kind of pain either and I know that exists for so many people. If it didn’t exist, there wouldn’t be wars over religion and people that “lose their faith”. How else can you define an atheist or agnostic? Aren’t they defined as someone that denies or questions the existence of God or the Creator and that the knowledge of the unknown is limited? Doesn’t that belief hurt?

It is difficult for me to understand an Atheist and not believing in some Higher Power or Universal Energy from which we are all created. Yet, I do have friends that believe this way. It does not make sense to me and I do not like getting into discussions about it. They usually have a very strong belief of their non-belief and that kind of thinking, in my opinion, also closes their mind off to the possibilities of what can exist in this life. I find them to be skeptics about a lot of things other than religion too. There really isn’t much I can say to change their mind because their kind of thinking requires them to believe that they are right. If they are not right, then in their thinking, it leaves the possibility open to God, or whatever you want to call the Creator, to actually existing and that would make them wrong. When they doubt or deny that something can exist, they tend to keep the doors of opportunities closed.

For the Agnostic questioning, “What is the truth about God and the existence of the Creator?” I feel that their question arises from a personal disagreement or discord about a particular religion they were raised in or the lack of a religion and understanding of the mysteries of our Creation. If this describes you, all I can say about this really is that you should keep searching for a religion that suites you if that is what is important to you. However, you may find more peace and comfort in just finding your own Spirituality, a belief that works for you and accept that as your Truth.

I’ve mentioned before about my mother’s studies about holistic healing. It was a part of her journey to find her own Spirituality, much like the journey I realized recently that I am now own. Her mother (my grandmother) is very religious, a Baptist. My mother never felt harmonious with this religious viewpoint and she sought her own way. As a small child that would spend some weekends with my grandmother I would go to church with her and learn the lessons taught from the Bible in Sunday school. As I got older and began to think more for myself, I started to understand what my mother was searching for. This particular faith’s viewpoint did not agree with me either.

I cannot really remember the sermons that were preached about in church but I do know that they did not leave me feeling good. The messages seemed to be angry. If we were created in the image of God as I was taught in Sunday school and many also believe, how can we be such sinners as the leaders of many religions would have us believe? How can one religion believe that anyone outside of their particular faith is condemned to Hell? Who says they are right and everyone else is wrong? Even among many of the different Christian faiths they believe that they are the only ones who will rejoice in heaven after we pass on from this life. How can this be?

Well, I am no theologian. I am simply a woman, created just like you were, in the image of Our Creator, who has found peace. I sometimes attend church in a faith that I feel is open to accepting many people no matter what their sexual orientation is, if they have been divorced, what their race is, or in which specific faith they were baptized as long as they believe in Christ as the Son of God. I believe that we all have a choice in what faith is our own Truth and that no one is better than anyone else. We are all children of the Creator. We should all honor and accept each other. Namaste.

I hope you have enjoyed my series on the responses I received about “What is painful in your life?” and my open thoughts about this discussion. I welcome your feedback and hope that I have been able to help someone reading learn a lesson about life that others learned from pain without experiencing any of their own.

You can find out more about Neale Donald Walsch at his website.

Posted in Personal Development | No Responses »

How much is this going to cost me?

Friday, July 3rd, 2009

Financial Pain – so many of us feel it and no one really wants to talk about it. It’s all you hear or read about sometimes in the media – “The New Economy” and “These Tough Economic Times”. No one brought this up in response to my question, “What is painful in your life?” I know that many of you have this as a silent answer that pains you in your life and wallets. It’s something that I have felt the majority of my life too.

I did not come from an affluent family and I mentioned before that my parents were very young when they had me. They missed out on getting a college education because of it and because it was not necessarily part of the advantages that would have been handed to them even if I had not come into their lives so early. Their parents weren’t necessarily financially blessed either. If they were, my parents were not taught about how to handle money and make it grow. Since I didn’t learn this from my parents and I really didn’t learn it in school, I had to figure it out on my own.

What I learned from them is that I needed to do well in school, so I could go to college, get a degree, and get a good job. They didn’t specifically tell me that I had to do this. It is what I observed and learned by their examples of hard work, dedication, and work ethic. I rebelled against my parents. I didn’t want to be exactly like them. I didn’t get pregnant at an early age, then married and divorced, I went to college and got my degree, and I got a job. In fact, over the years I have had several, often many at the same time, even while in college. Still with the formal education I received I do not feel I turned out any better off than they did financially. I still struggled to pay my bills every month, just having enough to get by, and running up my credit debt so that I could enjoy my life too. Maybe if I had a husband to share my expenses I’d be a bit better off, but I have had to do this all on my own and I haven’t wanted to depend on someone else for my financial security. It’s scary to think that something could suddenly happen and they lose their job or cannot work because of an accident. How many of you have learned these same lessons or have the same concerns I do?

I have learned that getting a formal education and landing a good job is not enough to survive anymore. I keep reading in the headlines all of the time about layoffs and cutbacks. I’ve even experienced it where I work. We need to be resourceful and we need to have multiple streams of income. This is one of the secrets I have learned to financial success. It is part of the foundation taught in most financial wealth strategy books.

Besides taking courses that advance my personal development, I have been learning about other opportunities to generate income passively. I do not want to take on another part-time job just to make my ends meet. That leaves me with too little time to enjoy life and to stay healthy. I would rather find a way to generate income by doing the things that I love so that I can quit my J-O-B and leave me more time to play. If you are doing something that you love, then it doesn’t matter how many hours a week you do it, because it is your life and it is not something you would consider work.

So many people lately have been praying for things to “change” in their lives to make them better. A lot of them even voted for someone that promised he could give it to them. The only way that a “change” for the better in your life is going to happen is for you to take some action and do something about it. Praying or voting for it is not enough. You have to act. In order to act, you need to educate yourself with the opportunities that exist. If you don’t know where to start, find someone who is living the kind of life you want. Learn what they have done, let them be a mentor to set an example and teach you how to get the “change” you want. In the early 1900s Napoleon Hill learned the secrets of success when he interviewed over 500 successful men and women as a reporter with the influence of billionaire Andrew Carnegie. He put his findings together in a book called Think and Grow Rich. It is known to many successful entrepreneurs as the “Bible” of Wealth and Success.

I have met, been learning from, and even worked for several multi-millionaires. What I can tell you about them is that not one of them has just gone to college, gotten a good job, and they made their millions just by working for someone else. Some of them never even went to college. They have found ways to make their money work for them instead of the other way around. Sometimes it even means that they give away their money. It’s true; when you give joyfully it will multiply and come back to you. Look at Bill Gates for example. He and his family now give away billions of dollars every year and he still continues to top the charts on Forbes’ Wealthiest People in the world lists. Sir Richard Branson, one of my favorite billionaire entrepreneurs, is fearless when it comes to pursuing opportunities and creating new companies that people love to work for. He takes risks and sometimes they did not work out. He has never let that stop him. Just because one endeavor or another may have failed, he is not a failure because he continues trying new ideas and many of them work.

Not now, I have a headache

Thursday, July 2nd, 2009

This discussion about the different types of pain has to do with Mental Pain. When I asked, “What is painful in your life?” the first response I received was from someone who has been going back for more schooling to advance her career.

“The roots of education are bitter, but the fruit is sweet.” – Aristotle.

It seems to me that learning is another one of those “good kind” of pains. Exercising our minds, especially if it is on a subject that is completely foreign to us or a long time has passed since learning anything in a formal education environment, can be a painful experience.

The brain is a muscle and to keep it healthy we should be continually exercising it. There will be times when this is very difficult and can be physically-mentally painful. I went to a 4-day training event once on a subject that always interested me, however, I had no clue about. I had no prior knowledge on this subject and it took a while for the concepts I was learning to click into place. I could visually see the concepts being taught through examples and I understood the principles behind it, I was learning the language of the subject, and, after a few days, the pieces of the puzzle began to fit so that I comprehended and it made sense. It is still not a natural subject for me and it will take more studying and practice (continually exercising and building my mental muscle stronger in this area) for me to become proficient at what I learned. While I was learning this new subject and the skills, I developed a headache. My brain was performing tasks on a subject that was different than anything else I had ever learned before. It was as if the electrical signals that the brain produces to tell your body to perform different functions were creating new neurological pathways in order to bridge across the different areas of my brain to come together for the understanding of this new knowledge. At some point during the learning process everything began to click into place and my headache disappeared. I can only describe this kind of headache as being a mental one and not a physical one such as when I get my occasional migraines due to fatigue.

When we exercise our brains and learn new information, we open ourselves up to more opportunities in life. This gives us more choices to select from in order to improve how we live. If we do not subject ourselves to some mental pain by exercising our brains beyond our current knowledge, then we could expect to stop growing. If we stop growing, then it must mean that we are dying. Perhaps not dying in the physical sense that we cease to live and breathe in our bodies, but in the sense that we struggle emotionally and kill off relationships that once made us feel good. We could be dying financially because we have not learned a new way to earn a living or advance our careers to match our wanted lifestyles. We could also be dying spiritually because we have not explored spirituality and religion enough to find a way or belief that suites our individual needs.

Mentally we could be going crazy because we are denying or are denied by someone or something else to fully express ourselves. When we resist what is persistently on our minds it will continue to show up, furthering the very thing that you are trying to avoid. When you can put your focus on something, address what it is fully, it will disappear. You will no longer be mentally bothered by the thing you struggled so long to resist. If you want something to go away, focus your attention on it. Deal with what emerges, learn about it, figure out what caused you to react the way you have, and make a decision to let it go. Sometimes you will find that there is nothing to decide about and it simply goes away.

Sometimes the thing that denies us to be able to express our mental thoughts clearly is actually a physical challenge. We could have a learning disability that prevents or makes it very difficult to comprehend what we are being taught, such as dyslexia. We could have physical disabilities or limitations with our bodies that challenge what we can do even though our minds can comprehend, such as Parkinson’s. There could be a mental challenge, such as Autism, in just expressing and receiving information the same way as a non-challenged person does. All of these things and more contribute to the mental pains that we all experience. How many of you know someone who is limited in their mental learning or expressions and have no idea of how to help them? Let’s suppose you do not currently have any of these physical challenges yourself, can you imagine your frustration if you were put into their bodies and yet your mind still thinks the same as it does now? What can you do now that will improve the life of someone you know or love that does face these challenges? Put yourself in their shoes and figure out what is the best way to help them. The answer may be very different than the way you would need help with your own challenges.

I’ve been reading several books, attending seminars, listening to recordings by motivational speakers, and I’ve even gone for some one-on-one therapy specifically when I needed it. No one method of learning is better than another for anyone who is searching for answers. I believe the best way of learning is to try different methods and to have an open mind to other ways so that you do not limit what you can learn. I find that a combination of many methods works best for me. Just as when you go to school for a formal education, some people learn in a lecture environment, some by working hands on doing the exercises, and others by just reading and studying the textbooks assigned to the subject. Those that excel are probably the ones that do all of these things and does not restrict their learning by only using one method.

Visit some of my links in the right hand column to explore some of the opportunities that are available and I have found to work for me or that works for people that I know. Let’s discuss Financial Pain next and explore some of the opportunities that are out there to overcome it.

Posted in Personal Development | No Responses »

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